Jello Time With Jen

Most churches I know of love to feed the kids their body weight in goldfish crackers.  Another thing churches like are bake sale auctions for fundraisers.  There are few things as oddly amusing as watching the entire congregation have heated bidding wars for brownies.

Anyway, the point is that watching church members bid for baked goods is fun, to say the least.  Unless you go to my friend’s church, - then you get to see them battle for a jar of salsa.

Then I started thinking of how I could participate.  There is always that one person who’s item attracts the most attention and bids.  I think that I have potential to be that person.  I don’t want to brag about myself but it is true.

Without supervision, my cooking is terrible.

(Just the other day, my dad demanded that I make a hot dog for him.  I did. The next day, he claimed that I gave him food poisoning.)

So, my friend and I came to the conclusion that whatever I made would become an instant hit…because the taste is so unbelievable that you would have to try it for yourself.

Now, the next order of business was what to make.  Then it hit us - Jello.  It dates back to a day where we played with Jello molds.  The first half of our cooking endeavors were spent cleaning up after my malfunctions.  But we had a great time, so much so that we know look forward to cooking fails together.  It has gone down in history as “Jello Time With Jen”.  And if I had my own webshow, like all my friends think that we should do together, it would be aired as a special feature.

After reminiscing about it, a brilliant idea struck me.  Instead of auctioning off just Jello, we could action off “Jello Time With Jen.”  To think, people would bid over who got to have Jen in their kitchen to spend the day making Jello.

A second later however, the thought terrified me.  One, I am ashamed that my ego is so big.  Second, I have horrible luck with creepers.  I was supposed to be hanging out with my friend as therapy from the guy who wanted me to date him…and come to his apartment…with the memory foam bed…to spend a “sleepover” supposedly watching movies. I hung my head in shame.  A frightening mental image struck me, a room full of my stalkers and old men trying to buy “Jello Time With Jen”.  It made me want to cry.

While I could auction off my Jello, “Jello Time With Jen” would not be avalible.
That lovely experience will be reserved for select individuals.