Of African Safaris and Wieners

My friend had ACL surgery a while back.  Ever since I have marveled at the fact that I have never been injured in such a way that required hardcore pain medication.  Which is just as well because I have seen its effects.

Vicodin in particular can turn brains into mush. When I first witnessed it, I was enlightened.

My friend sprained her ankle badly once.
The conversation went something like this-

My Friend (name not given for obvious reasons): *sitting there waving her hand up and down rapidly*

Me: uh...what are you doing?

Friend: I am on an African safari! I am petting ZEEEEBRAAAAZ! Are you here too?

Me: ??? : /

The second time I witnessed this phenomena, I was on a road trip with my friend Lindsey and her family.   Her mom was on vicodin for back problems.  I had thought that I had seen the worst.  I was mistaken.  

Friend's Mother (to her husband): You're a wiener.

Everyone Else: . . . ?
Mother (to Lindsey): Lindsey, would you rather go to Disneyland with a weiner or to Sea World with a weiner???? Either way you are with a wiener.

I feel as though I lost IQ points typing this....